Honestly, I am amazed at how a week this year, still manages to bring to the front of my mind the feelings of the same week thirteen years ago. You see, one of the times that I can clearly remember talking to my aunt was then. It came in a phone call, because being in New York they had said that the plane had crashed in Pittsburgh. And that would have meant that my family was affected. And yet, we were affected. It changed my brother's year at college... It reminded us to be grateful for the fact of all our friends who no longer worked in the towers. And yet it also brought us a level of pain and loss. Too many friends felt the sting of loss... and even then other friends became the "walking dead".
In this desire to push ahead and turn a day of death and destruction into Patriots Day... I wonder if the "walking dead" have been able to get unstuck and move forward. It is a question that I may never know the answer to, because we left New York behind a long time ago... and being sued for divorce, many of the friends we have had are pushed because they were friends with my husband long before me. And I have just come to accept that. Accept that in this moving forward... my husband is getting almost everything.
And yet, I wonder if I am not be entrusted with the one person who is the blessing from God, and if that trust is worth more than all the money we could ever have. And to still be able to love God... Does that not make me richer than most people in this world? I often wonder, and yet know that I may never know the answer to the question. Still as I sit here beside my munchkin who is yet again sick enough to be back in the hospital... I am thankful for the trust God has shown me with raising her, and allowing me to teach her to love God. And in that teaching... She is learning about those who came before her, so she can teach those yet to come...
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